Got Google Glasses? Better Watch Your Ass!

2013 March 21
by Turk Studzel

Cyborg Spy Model wearing Google eyewear

How sexy are eyeglasses that transmit your location and everything you see and hear to a Google server? Glasses that automatically recruit you as a cyborg spy for  anybody with access to this information (i.e., the NSA, FBI, CIA, DHS)? Of course, to Google’s managers and shareholders the money-making potential of vast new streams of personal information are incredibly sexy. But will consumers buy into the game? Already there’s growing resistance — after all, nobody likes to have their picture taken without consent — but can people really say no to what will surely be promoted as must-have cutting-edge technology? Is there a limit, beyond which we will refuse to pass?

Google Glass Cyborg Prototype: Star Trek's "Seven of Nine"

According to the “hacktivist” group, Anonymous, only full-spectrum countermeasures will prevent Google from further shredding our privacy protections under the Bill of Rights. That’s why rebel computer scientists are now developing what they call “internal feedback devices” or IFDs that turn the brainwaves of Google Glass users against themselves. “People who wear these things are essentially drones,” one young researcher told me over coffee recently. ‘They’ve relegated a large part of their brain function to remote control by Google technicians. That’s why it’s a fairly simple matter for us go in and override their programming — to hack their brains, in effect. They’re essentially defenseless, having turned off their critical thinking faculties. So with the right codes we can make them shit in their pants, if we want. Watch this.”

My informant tapped a few keystrokes on his laptop, then turned the screen to show me video of a Google Glass user’s face suddenly filling with dread and shock as she swiveled to examine the dark patch spreading across the seat of her pants. With a sardonic chuckle, the rebel “hacktivist” continued:

“Most American teens begin adult life crippled by 12-15 years of heavy media brainwashing — a sort of electronic lobotomy. Consider that the average child today begins watching TV at two or three years old, and then quickly progresses to the Internet and then the smart phone — what we are seeing is a re-wiring of children’s brains, one designed to make the children more malleable and suggestive to indoctrination. First, for several hours a day, they are removed from their parent’s sphere of influence, which is replaced by corporate media that impress within their young minds a fascination and love for corporate consumer products, while in the background there is a constant drone of imperialist, militarist, and fascist messaging.  Once they’re old enough for a so-called ‘smart phone,’ they’re ready to spend the rest of their lives on the hamster-wheel. It’s sad, really, but we don’t have time for pity — these people are the enemy.”

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